I'm not really sure how 'back' I am. I don't seem to have the good thoughts flowing in my head. Thoughts are in my head, for sure. They are also flowing. But the creativity seems to be blocked by pain in my jaw, work, parenting, keeping up with reality TV, Facebook, and Twitter.
Stress overwhelms me. I don't have many nights that I don't wake up in a panic attack. I've been talking (screaming) in my sleep. There are lots of reasons why. It's not that much fun to talk about. NOT talking about it helps me not focus on it, but I guess it still bubbles up and shoves through in my sleep. There are no peaceful nights inside of my head.
I'm thankful for a lot of things, too. Like the fact that my little momma's play together so nice. They love each other so much and it is fabulous. I'm thankful that they are able to wash their own hair. I'm thankful that I don't have to change a diaper or haul a big bag of baby supplies around. I love babies, but I'm thankful I don't have to have any more!
Still waiting for my brain to think happy thoughts...
People Who Read My Crap
5 comments:
Holly, I'm so sorry you're having a hard time. It really stinks when you feel in a funk. I'm just starting to come out of my Winter blahs.
I do think of you and wish you positive thoughts!!! I'll keep reading as long as you'll keep typing, as little or as much as you feel like:)
Take care of yourself!!!!
I like your blog always first time I came into this blog during search of
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I have night panics as well. Everything comes rushing in on me when I lay down and I panic.
One thing that has helped me is to listen to guided meditations when I get in bed. Specifically this video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WksMC6qqiI8
Don't watch it until you're in bed. Lying down because it will put you out fast.
Another things that helps me is to just take deep breaths. I swear I never breath during the day. At night I force myself to take deep, deep breathes and count them. I rarely ever make it past 10.
Hope that helps and wish you well.
Your pal - Malan
Miss you and hope things are better!!
Please hang in there. Stay strong. You deserve happy.
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