What it is.

Saturday almost night. Just woke up from a nap. Word. Yeah, I took a nap at 5pm. That's how I roll. Bev and I snugged up in da bed.

Speaking of Beverlies in the bed- not such a good idea. Beverly pee'd in the bed on Thursday night. That really isn't cool. I don't know about anyone else, but I don't really like pee. I don't like it in my bed or on my person.

The thing is, I don't know how to get Beverly in the crate at night night. She goes in the crate during the day. She doesn't love it but she does it. I guess we will try tonight and see how it goes.

Oh Mah Gah, Becky....

Beverly seems to really listen when we talk. Except she doesn't give a shit.

"Don't bite my face off, Beverly!" She thinks to herself, "So what. I do what I like to do."

Beverly has earned the nickname, "Vampire Bat." What do you think? This pose would be better if you could see her fangs, but the delay on my digital sucks.

And this is what she looks like when she's worn out from terrorizing our family. She looks sweet with a flopped ear and her toy right beside her. Do not be fooled. She really is the Vampire Bat and she wants to draw blood.

Little Lil had a terrible night last night. She woke up and cried and cried for a good 2 hours at midnight. I got her in bed with me. She didn't have a fever, so I'm not sure what the problem was. I gave her Motrin and she slept until 10am. I had decided to work from home since I couldn't wake her up and was afraid that she was coming down with something. She came bouncing in the living room and was her perfect happy little self.

We enjoyed the day dodging Beverly's bites together.

Please Call FEMA or the National Guard

I have crisis at hand:

1) I am dying. The smiz-oke at work has done damage to my delicate upper respiratory system. I'm on the verge of death. The inside of my brain is on fire, and my nose is either stopped up or running. Just breathing out of my nose hurts.

2) My vacuum cleaner is dead. I know it just needs to be cleaned, but I am dying. How am I supposed to do this when I'm on the verge of death?

3) Last and most horrific of all, the heating element on our dryer went out. A day without 2 loads (at least) of laundry is NOT OK. It is actually in our marital agreement that I must have functional washer/dryer appliances as well as updated flooring/counter tops/light fixtures/paint. Call me whatever you wish, but these things are crucial to my functionality.

I must go now and spray pure bleach up my nose because I can still smell smoke. After that, I will swig some cough medication with codeine straight from the bottle and take an Ambien.

Photo Updates

Caught the girls playing a little Bite Face! Hailey keeps trying to front, but The Adorability of Beverly is wearing her down!

Little Little Momma- STOP getting so big!

Photo by LLM:

Photo by BLM:

Making Cute look easy:


Sweet Sisters!

Ready for the Cutest Girl at School Competition!

Molly Came Over

Our neighbor thought she was bringing Hailey, our chocolate lab home to us. Hailey was home, in the house. I called the vet, and the extra chocolate lab turned out to be Molly- a neighbor's dog. The girls looked EXACTLY the same. We let Molly and Hailey in the back yard and we couldn't tell them apart!

I was very thankful to our neighbor for bringing Molly over. Our neighbor Mr. Coach (an elderly gentleman) was getting ready to beat her with a stick! Ugh! Can't even imagine that. Molly was not menacing at all and was quite comfortable to come right in our home and let our 8 week old puppy lick and bite her. Gotta start watching out for the Coach! My goggies don't get out anyway, but still.

The girls and I had a wonderful nap (all in the bed together, with Beverly).
Mt. Laundry is almost conquered.
My laptop still stinks.
The house will get cleaned tonight after the girls are gone.

Give Me A Break!

PTL PTL PTL this week is OVER!!!!!!!

I am so tired, but fresh sheets are waiting for me on my bed. Even better, DDL put them on. Everything is just so much better when someone else does it for you. Like, make you a sandwich. Why is it that PBnJ tastes so much better when someone else makes it? maybe it's just me.

The smell of second hand smiz-oke is still up in my brain. It has smoked out my brain cells. I know that I've spent plenty of hours in a smoky bar before, but never 8 hours in a row four days in a row. Maybe four hours in a row five days in a row, but not 8 hours in a row four days in a row.

I've missed my girls- BLM is at a sleep over. I was able to spend some special time with LLM tonight.

She happened to say the cutest thing to Beverly this morning. Beverly pottied outside, and when she came back inside LLM clapped her hands and said, "Beverwee, I tso proud of yew!"

Speaking of the Beverly- she is sleeping in our bed ! Ceasar Milan would not be proud of me. I can't help it. She's so full of sweet puppiness. And she's spent a few hours in her crate and I don't want to make her get back in the crate. Don't freak- she's not in the crate for too long at a time, but periodically she will spend an hour or so in it. Just had to clear that up- don't need anyone thinking I'm a bad goggy mommy.

The Chicken Head Cut Off

That ^ describes my day. My week, really.

I love my job with every bit of my heart, but today was harsh. Totally my own doings, but I scheduled myself to do training out of town two days in a row from 1-7. So, the training takes place an hour from home and in a smoking break room (that's where the computers are located).

I wanted to cry all of the way up there because I don't like to miss out on the girls in the evenings and I sure as heck didn't want to miss out on Beverly this evening. She actually whimpered when she saw me tonight. She is a total babe. I am spoiling the ever lovin' shit out of her too. She's slept right beside me every night and I have loved every second of it. She puts her little tiny puppy head right on me and I get to smell her puppy smell. She wakes me up at 4am and I don't even care.

Let's run this bitch fest down:

• Didn't eat today (not a bad thing, but probably not a good thing energy wise).
• Didn't get a break from 6:30am until just now.
• Stood on my feet all day.
• Back is killing.
• Hair smells like smoke even though I washed it.
• House is dirty.
• There was no beer in the house when I got home.
• The girls were in bed when I got home.
• My routine is all jacked up, and when my routine is jacked up I get all wild and out of sorts and it isn't good for anyone, especially Daddylicious because the poor man takes the brunt of my evil. I'm trying to get the bitching over and out so he doesn't have to hear about it.

But- good things- I had 2 rock star helpers today. I could not have done it without them and I sent emails to our boss letting her know that they rocked.

I'm so tired that I don't know if my body can rest my brain.

Photographic Evidence

Hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day yesterday!

Here are a few photos from yesterday morning-

Beverly wakes up BLM:

There is no tricking the LLM. She was the first one awake in the house.

The first of many kisses!

Beverly has been super sweet. She napped with LLM and I yesterday, and when I woke up she was in the crook of LLM's arm with her head on LLM's shoulder. I moved ever so slightly to grab my camera and Beverly woke up and the moment was over.

We woke up at 4am again to eat and play and potty. The potty-ing is going really well. Very few accidents for a 7 week old!

The crate training- uh, I can't say that's going as well. I have slept with her 2 nights in a row, because she is so sweet and snuggly. We'll get there.

The New Girl

I do have pictures, but I will post them later!

We did a great job hiding Beverly from the girls. She stayed with my parents all evening (and their yellow lab, Daisy, loved her!)

Hailey (8), Oliver (1), and Phoebe (8) did not give her a warm reception. Hailey has frothed at the mouth and growled at her and nipped. This is to be expected. Beverly has to learn her place in this pecking order!

Beverly slept in bed with me last night. She was so soft and snuggly. I have the dog crate out right by my bed, but I told myself that a new baby would feel so much better her first night away from her litter mates if she slept with her new mommy. And she did. She did great, she didn't cry at all.

She woke up at 4am to eat and potty (outside!) We played for about 45 minutes and she was ready to nap again. We got in bed and slept until LLM woke up at 5:30. We put LLM back in bed (where both girls were sleeping) and put Bev in the bed with them.

Big Lil was super excited that she got a puppy for her half a birthday!

I promise pictures soon!

We're Expecting!

I know I've had a tubal (I'm spayed, in other words), but our new baby will arrive tomorrow!

This is Beverly! She is a 7 week old black lab. Her full name is Ice Cold Beverly. Ice Cold is another name for Andre 3000 (from Outkast- favorite group ever).

The Little Momma's have NO CLUE! We are hiding her tomorrow night with Mimi, Papa, and their yellow lab Daisy.

On Valentine's morning, she will put on her red Valentine's bandanna and wake the girls with sweet puppy breath kisses!

She's really MY puppy, as I will be the primary trainer and care giver for her formative puppyhood days. She will sleep in a crate beside my bed. I will be the one who gets up with her to potty her and take her outside at 5am. We will be walking with our chocolate lab, Hailey, who is 9 years old and who may or may not have the patience for Bev.

I take this puppy/dog business very seriously. This is one lucky girl. She has no idea what is in store for her! If you believe in an afterlife, you should probably ask to come back as the dog of whoever comes back as me.

Dental Drama

Oh the humanity!

Big Little went to the dentist today (she's been crying about her tooth for weeks). They did an xray and her front two teeth are going to be the first to go!

She is just outside of her mind with the thought of this and she's been crying since 3:45. It's been a dramatic day.

The teeth have to come out soon. One is infected because of a tooth injury that knocked it loose. That has been causing her pain and that's what's been making her cry all of the time. The only way to get that resolved is for the tooth to come out.

She does not want to wiggle the tooth. She does not want me to wiggle the tooth. She does not want the dentist to wiggle the tooth. She hates that place and she never ever wants to go back to that place ever again.

Crazy People

Big Little Momma celebrates her half a birthday on Valentine's Day. We've been making a big deal about it for, oh, 6.5 years now. It has turned into her additional birthday and she has come to expect grand things.

Poor little darling. We are really ruining her with the spoils. Not really, she's not bratty spoiled. She's so sweet you'd buy her anything. I promise you would. Why shouldn't a girl get a half-a-birthday? It's not a full-blown circus party, but we do get her a gift (hell, it's Valentine's Day and she'd get a gift anyway.)

I am debating about sending her to school on Valentine's Day in her pettiskirt. I think it would be adorable. Daddy thinks it might get ruined. I have an alternative outfit planned, just in case I chance my pettiskirt mind.

Daddylish had a low key birthday. I made dinner (please don't pass out) and cookies (the fridge kind that you put in the oven.) I'm a working mother, you know, and I don't have time to whip up a 5 layer Red Velvet Cake or anything.

Here are some more pictures of my birthday man. Everyone deserves to know how wonderful he is to me and to our pretties. A little story about how sweet he is- When we brought BLM home from the hospital, I was stunned because I didn't know what to do. I'm an only child and I didn't know how to talk the baby talk or goo goo gah gah with a baby. One day when she was a few days old, I listened to him as he changed her diaper. He used the prettiest and sweetest words with her. He totally taught me how to nurture our baby.

Happy Birthday!

To My Favorite:

You are the Best Baby Daddy ever.

Just Mousin' Around

Oliver (AKA Osama bin Oliver) captured a tiny mouse this evening. I saw him trotting down the hall with it in his mouth. It was a cute lil thing. Tiny. Just but a babe. I grabbed it out of his mouth with a Target bag. Daddylish did what he had to do to it.

Phoebe has always been my mouser. We had a cat door, and she loved to bring live mice and birds (yes, birds) inside for us. The last straw was a giant rat. We sealed up the cat doors and have moved (2 times) since then.

I'm on Facebook now. I don't know what it is, or what it is all about. I don't know if I can find the time to maintain. But, I'm there tonight and don't know when or if I'll be back anytime soon. It's hard enough just keeping the blog alive.

The weekend has flown by. Tomorrow should be nice with a visit from DDL's parents. However, Big LM has a hard time sharing Grammy with Little LM. It annoys the shit out of me because Little Little wants some of Grammy, too!

LaQuinta: Spanish For

1) No Conditioner
2) Limited Hot Water
3) Cold Room

I spent a long day at work. I am working about an hour from home, and when I finished my last class it was dark outside. I don't see very well to drive in the dark, plus I'm bone-tired so I made the decision to stay at LaQuinta: Spanish for "whatever pisses me off".

1) Thursday is hair washing night. I didn't want to pack my shampoo and conditioner. It's just one night. Surely my hair could survive ONE washing of sample size random hotel shampoo/conditioner, right? No Conditioner!! Shut the front door.

2) Every night is take a hot bath and shave my legs night. What the funk is going on at LaQuinta that they couldn't provide me with enough hot water? I was fa-reezing when I got out of the tub. Freezing and all of my hair is falling out from being pissed off because there was no conditioner applied to it.

3) My room is colder than I like it and I forgot socks.

Praise the Dear Lord Baby Jesus that tomorrow is Friday and that I will be in the office all next week. For all of my friends who commute for work- you are way stronger than I could ever be. I can't imagine driving back/forth an hour every day. I am tired just thinking about it!

Sunshine Talk!

The Big LM's teacher and I had a nice visit yesterday about the tooth anxiety and BLM's behavior at school. She's a really good student and she tries very hard. However, she wants to be perfect and does not want to attempt anything that she's not ready to be 100% perfect at. This semester is going to be a challenge for her with new curriculum, but she's going to do fine.

Big LM had a Sunshine Talk with the school counselor today. One of the wonderful things about living in a small town is that we know everybody. Mrs. Counselor is also Mrs. Principal. Mrs. Principal goes to our little lake community and Mrs. Principal was my school counselor when I was a young elementary student.

I couldn't get much out of what the so-called Sunshine Talk was about. But, it was a positive from what I could glean from BLM. Sometimes what happens at school stays at school!

I have come to the (rational) conclusion that no matter how much I worry, I cannot change the way BLM thinks of things. I can help her cope and I can nurture her with my motherly love the way my Mommy taught me.

The weight feels as if it is lifting from my shoulders. Hot tea and cold beverlies help. (Not at the same time, m'kay?)

Don't forget to visit Katy and enter her Scentsy contest. It's not my contest, so please be sure and leave comments for her about it. If you have never experienced the scent of the Scentsy, you are gonna love it. Go enter and I hope you win!

Give-a-way Goodness

My girl Katy at Fun with the Baker Five is selling the awesome Sentscy Product! Talk about make your house smell deee-lish!

She is doing a fun give away! Katy Says:

Hi Friends, I'm doing my very first giveaway. Aren't you pumped? I thought you might be. The items pictured above are two Scentsy Warmers and the Scentsy Bars. If you are the winner you may choose between the Milano Warmer (cream colored one) or the Bombay Warmer (the blue one). I have ordered six different Scentsy Bars and if you are the winner you may choose 3 of them for your very own.

In more simple terms:
Winner=1 warmer of choice Winner also receives=3 scentsy bars
Tell all of your friends and family to come on over to enter in my Scentsy contest. I'll make this very simple.

Rules:
1. Leave me a comment and I'll enter you.
2. Write a post about this and I'll enter you TWO MORE TIMES!!!
You may have a total of 3 entries, just let me know if you posted about it...ok, thanks!!
Ok, AWESOME!!! This will be way fun!!!

P.S. If there are more than 100 comments, then I will give something else away from the Scentsy Line {for a 2nd winner}....but that is for me to know and you to find out.
If you would like to visit my homepage at Scentsy: Go to www.scentsy.com/22701
FYI: There is a sale going on right now.......
THIS CONTEST WILL END FRIDAY EVENING AT MIDNIGHT!

Big Lil Momma

Is a dramatic thing.

We've had a hard night. At 4pm my mom went to pick her up from school and she was bawling in the nurses office because her tooth hurt. She is scared to DEATH of loosing a tooth. It's so hard to know what to say or do. She'll be fine for awhile, and then she'll freak out for awhile, and so on.

Poor thing has anxiety problems like me. She is pulling out her eyelashes (I can't think of the medical term for it right now, but it is an impulse control disorder.) I'm going to call her doctor and my therapist tomorrow to see if we can get her in with some cognitive behavior therapy. I want her to learn how to lessen her anxiety. Poor sweet thing has to be just like me!

I have good qualities too. I just don't quite know what they are!

Hi, My Name Is...

Hi, My Name Is...

Hi, My Name Is...

Mamalicious.

This is my blog. I love it when people read. It makes me feel special. I love blogging and it has become quite an obsession of mine. This is where I get to say what I want to say. I rather like it that way.

To all the lovely ladies who left supportive words on that post, I will propose sister-wifehood to every single one of you. Be looking for your invitation to our sister-wife commitment ceremony in your blogs soon.

For those who have not been here long, here are a few fact-o's about me:

1) I am dramatic .

2) I over react about everything (and I have since I was little, like 6 years old).

3) I have anxiety. I have a support system of my doctor, my therapist, and my psychiatrist and my wonderful family. My blog is a good place for the therapies too!

4) I am medicated for anxiety and depression. Things are going good. 2008 was the best worst year ever!

5) I am not the perfect parent. I have many things that disqualify me for being nominated as the Best Parent Ever Award. I work Full Time. I want to work Full Time. My kids eat pizza, McDonalds, and there is bribery when the situation calls for it (haircuts, shots). I think Best Parents Ever are a JOKE because no one is perfect. Have you seen the Best Parent Ever Blog? Get there soon.... even if you are not in perfect parent category.

6) I count down the minutes to bedime on most days.

7) I drink beer. In front of my children. My children have tasted beer. So did I as a tot. Because my parents let me. I liked it.

8) I like myself most of the time.

9) This is my blog (oh, did I say that already?)

10) This is the last time we'll talk about Anon-a-posters because Anon-a-holes are no longer to comment on my blog.

Thanks for letting me get that out there. I had a shit-ass week with a sad situation at work that I couldn't shake out of my head (remember, I am dramatic and I over react.... I own this.)

Check these chicks out... Today in Idabel Oklahoma. They totally made a post about me that made me feel, like, 100x better and they even have this graphic added to said post. LOVE YOU GIRLS AND YOUR BLOG TOO.

It's Probably A Good Idea

If you stay the fuck out of my blog.

Anonymous said...
It's probably not a good idea to reward your child with candy (especially two kinds, my goodness!) This is how childhood obesity gets started...Cute kid though :)

Thanks anyway, beeotch. Anon posters are mostly insecure fucktards who can't own up to their own words. I assume that you do not know me or my parenting stye. Either way, please exit and take your fucking judgemental crapola somewhere else.

I'm Not That Bad

70%How Addicted to Blogging Are You?

I mean, 70%. That's not THAT bad of an addiction is it? It's average.