I was reading Lacy's blog about her going to the Flea Market with her Granny, and I was reminded of something that happened to me a few years ago. Are you ready? Here it goes.
I had the LLM in July 06. Daddylicious and I always go to the State Fair of Tex-Ass in October for the OU-TX game. It's always fun and quite a booze-fest.
So, in October of 06 we went to the fair. It was the first chance that I had (as a brand new momma) to really relax and enjoy myself without having to tend to smallish people. We left the LM's with grandparents and we had the WHOLE WEEKEND to have fun.
The game was an early kickoff, so that meant we had to get to the fair ASAP to begin the drinking of the beer. We arrive around 8am and eat- then it's beer:30 so that we can get properly boozed up before going into the Cotton Bowl.
My day at the fair started out GREAT. I got id'd to buy beer and I could have made out with the beer guy it made me so happy. I drank about 4 or 5 (this is about my max) before it was time to go inside and find our seats.
I get in line for the Port O Potty. I'm never real happy to go to the Port O Potty, but I had to go REALLY bad and it was almost kick off time. I stood in line for so long that I was about to pee myself.
When it was my turn, I went into the Pot O Gold and did my thing. I felt so much better until I went to pull up my pants. I had FORGOTTEN TO PULL DOWN MY UNDERWEAR. Yes. That's what I said. I PEE'D through my underwear. Thankfully, I had on a very sheer thong (read: whore panties).
Logic would have told me to take off the whore panties and throw them away. Was I thinking logically? NO. I WAS DRUNK. Hello. I sat in pee'd on whore panties for the rest of the day.
There it is! Now you know everything. (Well, not everything. I also have a hard time knowing my right from my left. I can't tell time very well. AND I don't know my times tables.)
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12 comments:
That's really funny!
I can't tell time well and I don't know my times tables either! I also still count on my fingers. Thank God I don't teach math!
LOL. ME TOO! (well, not the pissed on whore panty part) but I have a hard time telling my kids shoes left from right. I also do not know my times tables, and I am an analyst!
That is the funniest thing I have heard in a long time...that is so something I would do...and sadly I wouldn't even have to be drunk, lol!!
GIRL you are CRAZZZEEEE! That is so funny. I am LMAO!
Oh hell, I always come home with a little pee in my jeans when I go out drinking. That's the mark of a good time. I'd be worried it I didn't!
Its ok internetz girlfriend... we all pee on ourselves sometimes.
I will have to blog about my pee story sometime.
ps. What does it make you if you dont wear underwears at all? probably something much more than just a drunk chick with dirty panties. Its clear that you made the right choice! LOL :)
I cannot stop laughing, I love that story... sadly I have several of those (they are also several years old).
XOXO
Oh Holly...some things we just don't share.
I referred to this post when I commented on "Queen Mommy"s blog over at "From Talbots to Target"
http://fromtalbotstotarget.blogspot.com/
She had mentioned in a post about wetting herself......
Oh my gosh, that had me laughing so loud. And I'm with you about telling time and the right/left thing. Remembering that the left index finger and left thumb form an "L" always helps me. :o)
OMG that is hilarious!
For sure we are hanging once I download this baby!
Oh hell. That sounds like an epi of My Name is Earl. Do you watch?
And don't go doing that this weekend.
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